I often help my clients find answers to difficult questions in their lives. But what I think I mostly do is strengthen the inner muscle that makes action based on these decisions nearly automatic. As difficult as it can be to see our problems clearly, it can be even tougher to know what path of action to take, and even more difficult yet to actually act.
I’m referring to Big Decisions, here. These are the kind of decisions that when made, affect every part of your life; from your family and social interactions, to your time and financial commitments, to the quality of headspace you’re in during typical, everyday moments. The tricky decision that I deal with most often is in the workplace: should I stay or should I go?
Even if your situation is not ideal, there can be a million reasons not to leave a job you aren’t happy with. Whether it’s logistical concerns like paying bills and providing for your family, or fear of cultural or societal reprisal, it can be overwhelming to even consider a change of such magnitude. I want to help you balance the pros and cons as accurately as possible so you make the decision that will be best for you in the long run.
First, read this list of ten statements and make a tally for every statement that applies to your feelings about your career. How many tallies do you have? If you’ve felt some twinge of recognition at two or more of these statements, it’s time to take a long hard look at your relationship with your workplace and consider your next step.
I want to challenge you to make this decision with your fears as silenced as they can possibly be. Our fears exist to keep us safe, but really they are meant to operate on a more elemental level (lions and tigers and bears, etc). Though the anxiety of leaving a job, especially if you’ve been there for an extended period of time, might seem like more than you willingly want to go through, you will not die or come to any bodily harm as a result.
What you open yourself up to is the possibility of truthfully making statements that directly mirror those you read in that list of ten: I’m excited to go to work. I feel valued and surrounded by likeminded people. I can see a future for myself here and the possibilities excite me. If you don’t feel this way now, ask yourself why not. Is there anything you can do to alter your perception? What trade offs would you have to make to feel that way? What, if anything, would you miss about your current situation?
If it’s time for you to make a Big Change, you’ll see that light blinking in your mind’s eye now. I hope this blog might be the helpful nudge you need not to send you over the cliff, but to get you close enough to the edge to see the view and encourage you to pursue your Big Dreams.